Exes

Yes, the title of this post refers to ex loves. Well, in this case, one particular ex and an experience I had with her recently. For those of you reading, who like scandal and all sorts of sordid intrigue, I'm sorry that this post isn't a confession of an illicit reunion with her that ended up sweating between sheets. Haha. It's much more G rated than that and an episode in how people can really move on and how a common bond, like Taekwondo, can bring people together.

I ran into this ex last week at the NJ USA Taekwondo Team practice. It's funny. I hadn't thought about her in a long time until about a month ago when I visited a former Taekwondo instructor of ours. When I was waiting for his class to end so we could have a chat, there was another woman in the waiting area. She turned out to be the mother of one of the teenage boys in class. I didn't recognize her, she didn't recognize me and I didn't recognize her son but he recognized me. It had been years, about nine, since I last saw him and he's no longer the cute curly haired kid of 7 or 8. Now, he's a handsome sturdy young man of 17. Well, as he and I talked and caught up, the mother joined us and we caught up and she was the one who mentioned my ex.

My ex and I didn't end on the best of terms (How many break ups do, right? Although, perhaps it's material for another post, but I have had the mutual break up without any residual guilt or longing with another ex.) so when I found out that she was still training a certain amount of anxiety crept in in how things might go if we did run into each other on the Taekwondo circuit. Well, States came and went and there was no contact. I went to the first NJ Team practice and there was no contact. I skipped the second practice but went to the third and there she was. I saw her before she saw me. It wasn't until I stepped out onto the training floor to stretch did our eyes meet. She tilted her head and smiled. I stopped stretching and walked over.

Here's the best part. We said hello and just started talking. There wasn't any awkward "Should we hug, kiss on the cheek, shake hands?" moment. We just asked how we were, caught up and started talking about our involvement with the NJ Taekwondo Team. I told her I was there as a competitor. She was there because her daughter, an adorable 8 year old black belt, was there because she's going to be competing at the Junior Nationals.

Midway through practice, and we'd already planned this, my wife and son arrived. They took pictures and I wanted my son to see what his dad is doing as he prepares for US Team Trials and Nationals. I introduced them to my ex and it was cool. Later, my ex and I talked about the training and some of our experiences with the other black belts in the room at various trainings and workshops. I even felt a little sense that we really had moved on because her daughter had expressed to her that she couldn't understand what some of the Korean masters were saying because of their accents and some of them don't have super strong English skills yet. Well, she said she'd told her daughter to go up to Master Bas since I speak English. My ex and I were talking like old friends. I don't think she felt any akwardness and I know I didn't.

At the end of the practice, there was no fanfare or big goodbye or grand "See you next time." She left with her daughter and I left with my family. And that was that. Chalk this up for what you will - two people, older and more mature, or the common ground of Taekwondo bringing us together in a better and different way, the power of children, I don't know. But, it was a really great experience. We were just two old friends catching up and getting along.

What about you? Do you have any positive running into your ex experiences? It can happen. It does happen.