Karma...or something like it

I've been super busy and with that has come a lot of stress. With the stress has come a lot of inwardly lousy days. In fact, I've used 'shitty' and 'crappy' to describe how things have been lately. And, I'm not boohooing because we all have periods like this. But, when we do, sometimes it's good to vent and sometimes little things happen that remind you that there is such a thing as karma; a reminder that when there's an uphill there's a downhill on the other side.

While the training itself has been going well, I've been stressing about all of my Taekwondo developments. The classes are going well but I wish we could get more students. My preparations from US Team Trials and Nationals are going well but they could be going better and there is also some large financial expenses that's going to come with them. Honestly, I don't know if I can pursue because of the costs.

And then there's my son. He and I were at the store today to buy a gift for a friend from day care. It's the friend's birthday party this coming weekend and Jude and I went to the store to get him something. Jude understood that we were going to get something for the friend and not him but when we got him Jude asked about the gift. When I put it away and reminded him that it's for his friend, he said it too but I could see there was a certain amount of confusion and sadness on his face. It broke my heart. I don't want my son to be a spoilt kid but, at the same time, I wish I could get him everything he needs and wants. To make it more heart-wrenching, the gift is a Thomas The Train Engine thing - Jude's favourite.

Add into the mix that a friend from work brought to my attention that someone was selling online wooden Thomas train set pieces for US$50. Jude has a started set, made also from wood, and I wanted to get that $50 set for him so he can build bigger train tracks and have more engines to play on it. Getting closer to the summer, I hesitated in buying the set because of money concerns. So, to see the look on my son's face, what I felt was more painful than any sidekick I've ever taken in my almost twenty-six years as a martial artist. It was even more painful than the one time I was knocked out in competition.

Well, here's the positive part. Shortly, after putting the gift and the other groceries away, I stepped outside to collect the mail. A neighbour came walking up carrying a large zip lock bag. She offered me the bag, saying that she was gathering things for a 'slightly used sale the local middle school is going to have and before she gave the stuff in the bag to the school she decided to see if Jude wanted them. You see, her son used to love them and seeing how much her own son enjoyed them she took a chance to see if Jude would. What was in the bag? Thomas The Train Engine pieces!  There weren't any track pieces for Jude to add to his own set but there were other engines, a crane piece with a magnet and some wooden trees and other decorative bits to put around the track.

This entire post might corny and, as a story, predictable but it's all true. And, while I'm still feeling tired and going through a down and overwhelmed period, my spirits were lifted having been reminded that good things do happen. It's just that sometimes they don't happen on our time but they do happen.

Well, thanks for listening everyone. I hope you have your own karmic positives and that you have lots and lots of them.